i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So vagazzling was a success
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
