i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize