this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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