we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
where are my eyebrows?
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