Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
it's like iHOP with fire
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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