I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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