the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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