He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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