i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
