You work out of a Hotel?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Less talking, more tequila
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
