i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I feel like a drive thru vagina
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
