Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
