She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
