what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
