How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize