Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
