marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize