I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
