But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Apparently you make a good broom.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
