That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
