I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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