it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
