I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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