Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
My liver just had a heart attack.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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