You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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