Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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