Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Randomize
