Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
