I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
