ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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