You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
