I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
