Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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