I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
