And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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