'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize
