Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
