Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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