Tell her she can't have a vagina
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize