i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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