there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Green mimosas i think yes
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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