Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
