yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize