Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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