anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
