If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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