I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
