I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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