If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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