chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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